My experience of confronting my demons of blame, irresponsibilty, and identity mercilessly haunt me. They are unhealthy beliefs preventing me from being mentally strong. The biggest barrier to installing this septic system is fear. I am scared of feeling stupid. I am out of my comfort zone, which ironically, is exactly the position I always find myself in; so it must be exactly what I need to confront the beliefs shaping my reality. Blaming Alex by ignorantly saying he "used the wrong tool" forced me to confront my unrealistic identity of knowing everything. In fact, I felt immediately more incompetent for saying it. Irony is reality. I broke several of my personal cardinal rules by blaming Alex. Here is the truth of the situation. Alex was a saint to fit me into her already jam packed scheduled last week. She came over after 2pm, in the rain, after working all day at another job. She worked with me in the rain for 4 hours. She was extremely thorough, helpful, and patient. She shivered for almost the entire time she was here with me. I was beyond grateful for her sharing her knowledge with me, and I would work with her or ask for her services in a heartbeat. She is very skilled and knowledgeable about electricity. I was extremely fortunate to garner her expertise.
Now, I will go throw up.
Life, what a ride.
Karen
DIO
Philosopher, Author, Artist, and no thing in particular. Beyond description. Completely unknown, yet totally familiar. Knows no thing and re-members every thing...same as you.
To Eliminate A King
Pure power materializes when intention parallels speech and action. Any disjunction between the three creates confusion, chaos, and destru...
